Hi.

Timothy's been a little slow in the talking department. But in the last few months, his vocabulary has exploded. Unfortunately, I'm really the only one who can understand it and many words sound ridiculously similar, so there are some days I still play the guessing game.

Of course, Dada was one of the first words he did come up with. And for a long time, Dada was used for both Erik and me. But about July, he finally started calling me Mama. At first, it melted my heart. It was so cute. And I was so happy he finally had a name for me. But now this is my life:



Every five minutes. All. Day. Long. Can we go back to not speaking? :)

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Ditching the Bink

Lily is a thumb-sucker. She has been since she was about 6 months old. When she first started, I was honestly ok with it. No needed to buy binkies. No hunting down the missing binky. No getting up in the middle of the night to return the binky. She was completely able to self-soothe, and I was thankful. Plus, sucking her thumb was mostly reserved for when she was tired or hungry or really distressed.

But when Timothy was born, I decided the bink was the way to go. Lily was three and half at the time and still sucking her thumb. Two years later, she still does on occasion. Not very often, for sure. Usually when she's really tired, and still when she's really distressed and upset, but there's not really anything I can do at this point other than encourage her to stop. So for Timothy, I decided I wanted the control. I wanted to be able to take the bink away when it was time. I don't know if he would have ever turned into a thumb-sucker, but his bink was always close, so there was no need. When he turned two, we cracked down. Nap time and bed time only. Most of the time. Admittedly, there were times we gave in. And he's not a dumb kid. He knew where the bink was in the diaper bag and would go hunt for it. When he'd wake up, it was chucked into his bed, and sometimes he could reach between the slats and get it. When we converted to a toddler bed about a month ago, it was amazingly easy for him to retrieve it. If we managed to get it away from him again, it ended up on a counter or the bookcase, and once he'd see it a couple hours later, it was all he wanted.

I was dreading the day we took it away completely. And I wasn't sure what the plan of attack would be. I'd read different theories, like having the kid either watch you or making them throw it away. There's also the method that involves taking a pair of scissors to it while your kid watched. But they seemed so cruel. I mean, come on. They're attached to the thing and you cut it all up. I figured cold turkey was the way to go, but I wasn't looking forward to it.

Then last week happened. I could not find the bink any where. I had a spare in the medicine cabinet, but I decided to see what would happen. So when it was time for bed, we brushed his teeth. We grabbed his blanket. We read some stories. We sang a few songs. Then I put him in bed. And then he asked for bink. "Sorry, buddy," I said. "I don't know where bink is." "Bink?" he asked again. "I don't know where it is. Say bye-bye, bink."

And he did. Could it really be that easy? I guess so, because he hasn't looked back. I can only hope potty training is just as easy. The missing bink mysteriously reappeared a few days later, luckily while Timothy was busy doing something else. It was quickly whisked out of sight, never to be seen again.

 

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Our demon?

So after a two-month blog hiatus, I'm finally posting something. Was my life completely uneventful over the last two months? Probably not. Did I have the motivation to actually post anything of substance? Not one bit. But I don't really remember what happened over those two months, so I probably should have made some sort of effort to document what went on.

I'm over it.

We did get some new pictures of the kids recently, so I thought I'd share. I posted some to Facebook, but it feels more official to share them this way. :)

Looking at these adorable kids, you'd never know the turmoil we went through. The photo session started out pretty nicely. Lily was cooperative, and Timothy sort of stood where we asked. But then Timothy got bored and started wandering all over the studio. At one point, we were bribing him with jelly beans. Which worked for about 2 minutes until he caught on that we were getting what we wanted, too. For about a minute, though, he did walk over to his chalkboard fish and pose for us very nicely. While we were distracted on different background for Lily of course. But then he decided he just wanted to be held and putting him down resulted in a classic two-year-old tantrum. Not to mention one of the jelly beans happened to be purple and his face and shirt now had purple goo everywhere.

And once the chalk came out, that's all Lily wanted to do. We were able to convince her to do some more shots on a different background, but then suddenly she was done. She didn't want to do pictures, but she didn't want to leave either. A real problem (that was eventually resolved by physically carrying her out to the car). I told her it was ok to be done if she wanted, but she insisted she wanted to do some more. So we sat her on a cute pink ottoman to try a few more, but she just sat there and sulked. And she even chose the ottoman. What exactly are you supposed to do in a situation like that? Because I feel completely inept when they come up. Do I try to comfort and console her and try to fix the situation? And completely waste the time of the photographer? Or just tell her we're done and leave. At home, I would just ignore it, and she'd scream like a banshee and tell me how mean I am for putting her in time out for such an over-the-top reaction. But we're in PUBLIC. You can't let your kid do that in public. So I tried the comforting as long as I thought was appropriate, and then I carried her out kicking and screaming.

Not really the way I wanted the whole thing to go.

All I can say is, for a studio setting, I can't recommend the people at Whimsy Photography enough. It probably didn't hurt that we were a morning appointment on a Friday when they weren't super booked, but they were amazingly patient with our moody kids and made a real effort to get pictures we would like. They even offered to have us come back on a day when Timothy was in a better mood before we paid for anything. We ended up totally pleased with the final product, so we didn't take them up on it. But the offer was there.

But back to my moody kids. Really...any advice would be appreciated at this point. Ok: Timothy's a toddler and almost two. I understand his tantrums to some degree, and they're usually calmed by distracting him or ignoring the tantrum completely for a few minutes. And honestly, I think most of his stem from the fact that he understands everything we say, but he can't communicate back. It's a guessing game most of the time. Although I'm getting  better, and the words are starting to come, so hopefully, the end is in sight.

But Lily? She's a dang 5 year old! I asked her pediatrician at her checkup if it's normal to be so emotional. He basically told me adolescence starts in girls about this time.  Are you kidding me? If I have to deal with this for 10-12 more years, I won't make it. She's up and down, and you never know what will set her off. We try to say yes enough that she gets to choose things and activities and make her own decisions. And she's a pleasure to be with then. But as soon as she hears no, the demon is unleashed. And it just makes me want to say no more because why should I be nice at all when it all ends with the same melt down. In fact, she's been almost unbearable for the last month. Am I a terrible mother for even thinking that? Is it my fault? Is it just the way she is? She's always been "spirited," but now she's old enough to really assert herself and I just don't know what to do. And the books are no help. NONE! She won't calm down enough for me to try any of the tricks, and since what sets her off one day is no prediction of the next, I can't head her off before it happens.

But the times when she's not a demon? She is the nicest girl ever. She is the friendliest girl on the playground and can't understand why someone wouldn't want to play with her or that not everyone is really her friend. She helps all the little toddlers swing and go down the slides. She shares all her digging tools so everyone can play in the wood chips. She builds forts for Timothy and chases him around the house to make him laugh. She reads him books and helps him put on his jammies. And she feels everything so deeply...the good and the bad.

One thing I do remember over the last couple months is the purchase of Pop, Lily's betta fish. He's been living in a bowl on her bookcase for about 6 weeks or so. Maybe a little longer. Tonight when she went to feed him, as she has done faithfully since he came home with us, Erik had to break the news that he'd died. Her little heart was broken. She said she was going to miss him so much. And where do fish go when the die? Is heaven in the toilet?

I know (hope?) the over-emotional bit is a phase. And I know that the real Lily is the happy, loving, smiling one. I just wish we got to see her a little more some days. Or I could figure out the secret to locking up the other version. At any rate, thanks for reading the longest post in history (if you made it this far). I make no promise of future posts, but let's all cross our fingers.
 

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Of Her Very Own

Lily has a favorite show called Calliou. He's a 4-year-old boy with a little sister doing a lot of the same things Lily does. Playschool, helping with Rosie, trying new things. On one episode, he went to the library. Since then, Lily has asked when we can go. Completely intending to go, I told her we'd find a day. Several times, I planned when we would go. Luckily, I never actually mentioned it to her since every time, something else came up and the library trip got pushed aside.

Last week, I decided we were going no matter what. So on Friday, we headed to McDonald's for lunch and some time in the play place as soon as Timothy woke up from his nap, and then we headed to the library. Just so you know, this was very purposely planned. Lily's not always great about leaving the play place, so I hoped the lure of the library would help. And it did. She left without complaint, and it only took one request for her to put on her shoes so we could go. I suppose I could have skipped McDonald's altogether, but I was feeling generous (and brave) that day, so I risked two outings that could end in kicking, screaming, tears, and yelling. Plus, my memories of the library include a treat, too, and I guess I wanted to pass that on.

When we arrived at the library, Lily looked at all the books. We picked out a few to take home and then read a few while we were there...mostly books she thought Timothy would enjoy. Then we got Lily a library card of her very own and checked out her books. She was so excited to take them home, and the promise that we would be back to get more was almost more than she could stand.

I can remember getting my own library card when I was about 5. (Or maybe 6? Who can remember that far back, really. But I do remember I wrote my name on it with my beginner's scrawly handwriting so I couldn't have been too old.) At some point, it became a tradition that every week, we headed to the library. Afterwards, we stopped at Baskin Robins for some ice cream. (My brother always got Daiquiri Ice. I usually tried something different each time.)  It's one of my favorite memories, and I'd like to give my kids something similar. Although, their favorite memories will probably be something completely different.

So we now have a Friday tradition. We probably won't hit up McDonald's every time, but a stop at Charlie's may be in order. If anyone wants to join us, feel free.

 

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Changes

Lily has had a couple changes in the last few weeks. The first one was fairly major. After months and months of asking her to not stand on the couch while watching TV and standing super close to TVs other than ours, I decided to take her to the eye doctor. Turns out the kid needs glasses. In fact, she's more nearsighted than I am - which compared to Erik's prescription, isn't hard. But still...the girl's only 4. So I'm sure we'll be getting thicker and thicker lenses for the poor thing until she's old enough to handle contacts.

So after two trips to the eye doctor (once for the exam and once more for dilation), it was official. We looked at a couple pairs of cute frames at in their office, but good heavens! They were so expensive for something that she's probably going to break...even with the warranty, I found it hard to justify spending that much. So we checked out our trusty Wal-mart...much more reasonable. And considering that when we told her to pick one from a few choices and she told us, "But I don't want to wear the same glasses every day," I'm really thinking cheaper is the way to go. We'll probably end up buying at least one more pair so she can change it up when she wants to.

I really do think it's made a difference for her. Of course, she didn't know she couldn't see. But now she can, and I think she's much happier. The first couple hours were a little odd, I think, since she almost tripped several times and she was very fascinated with the floor while she was walking. And apparently, "Everything is so shiny!" But she will now sit on the couch to watch TV (it probably doesn't hurt that we rearranged the living room so standing on the couch wouldn't help anyway) and I know she's seeing (see what I did there???) an improvement because after her gymnastics warm up the other day, she changed her mind and decided she wanted to wear them. She's been really good about remembering to put them on, and other than the small mishap of leaving them on the floor to get stepped on, she's been pretty careful with them. A little tweaking, and they looked good as new. And she looks so darn cute!

The second change, you can see in that picture, too. Lily now rocks bangs. Yesterday, she was walking around with her hair completely in her face. And this isn't an unusual occurrence. Gone are the days that she will sit and let me do something completely cute with her hair. We've reached the point that we're lucky if she lets us brush it every day. Although since we bought a hair bean (highly recommended for anyone with a daughter), we can usually manage a brush-through with little resistance. But since rubberbands is now a bad word, the sides and front just fall in front of her eyes. It would drive me crazy, but she doesn't seem to mind. Which does drive me crazy. So I opted to make the most of the situation. The hair that normally falls in her face is now short enough that she can still see. Problem solved.

With a new hair cut and new glasses, she's adorable, as always. But she also seems so grown up. She turns 5 in January, and I can't wrap my poor head around that. She's sure fun and is just growing so fast. She's suddenly discovered descriptive words, so everything is beautiful or cool or fantastic. She told me the other day that she wants to be a parent when she grows up...instead of a mail carrier. When I told her she could be both, she was so excited! And when she gives me a hug, she tells me she can hear my heart beeping. I hope I'll always remember this stage when she tries to show all she knows and is so eager to learn more. There's rarely a day when she doesn't make me proud of her in some way. She's definitely my special girl.

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I'm a Mom

I'm not going to lie...having two (or more) kids isn't always easy. There are some women who make it look so easy. Their kids are always well behaved. They are cool, calm, and collected. Their hair is perfect, their makeup's done, and there's not a wrinkle in their clothes.

I am not that woman. I'm not saying having one kid was a complete walk in the park. But for some reason, doubling the number of munchkins in the house tripled the stress. Of course, it might just be the 4-year-old. We've hit a phase where every time we get in the car, we're bombarded with "How much longer?" and "Are we there yet?" This is before we've even pulled out of our neighborhood.  And heaven forbid Timothy even look in her general direction (Stop looking at me!!!!) or babble something cute (Don't talk to me!!!!). We're working constantly on sharing since she doesn't seem to grasp the concept that if she wants to play with all Timothy's fun toys, she needs to share with him occasionally, too.

Don't get me wrong. Timothy is not a complete angel in all these situations. He's figured out how to push her buttons for sure. Stop looking at you? Well I'm going to stare you down and maybe even come sit right next to you to bug you even more. Don't talk to you? I'll make even more noise! He's also a greedy little bugger. You can give him something to eat and then get your own. And it's the EXACT. SAME. THING. But yours is much more appetizing. And if you give in and let him have some of yours even though he still has the same thing on his plate, he won't touch it. He'll eat what you gave him in the first place. It's just some twisted test.

But then there are days they are so fun to watch. They play together and love each other and make you so happy that they have each other. They have the best time playing with Lily's kitchen. Occasionally Timothy ends up with the chef's hat, which is the most adorable thing you've ever seen. He pretends to eat the plastic food she assigns him (with appropriate "smack-smack" and "yum") and will even pass her the food she's assigned herself. Timothy will throw balls down the stairs and Lily will bring them back up for another round. Lily will make a fort in her room so they can jump into the pillows and blankets together. Lily will chase Laddie around just to make Timothy laugh because he thinks it's HILARIOUS to see Laddie bolting around, sliding on the wood floors.

Last night, we'd just finished bath time and I was putting on Timothy's jammies while Lily was putting on hers. Timothy and I finished first, so he toddled into her room. And I guess sat in one of the bins from her toy box. It's not very deep...just a couple inches. Just the right size for him to step in with his blanket and have a seat. So Lily gave him a ride back to his room, which he thought was about the best thing ever. They ended up doing this for about 45 minutes. Back and forth between their rooms. Timothy would hop out for a second at the end of each ride and then get back in to go again. Since I was in his room, he would wave until he couldn't see me anymore as they headed to her room.

I so desperately wanted to go grab the camera, but from past experience I knew that once Lily saw the camera, the fun would be over. So instead, I let them have this fun time together...a little sad that we wouldn't have pictures to remember this cute game. But hopefully in between all the "He's touching me!" and "She won't stop looking at me!" moments, we'll have enough of the ride-in-the-toy-bin moments and the play-with-the-dog moments that eventually, the fun times will be the foundation for a close relationship.

I know that for me, it makes it ok that my hair isn't always perfect, there are some days I don't even touch my make up, and yes...I probably have something from a grubby hand on my clothes. It means I'm a mom to two beautiful, loving, amazing kids.

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One Year Old

On Sunday, Timothy turned one. Can you believe it? One already. We had a little party for him on Friday, and I attempted to make the cake myself. It was first time working with fondant, but it turned out pretty cute...although fondant is definitely not for eating. It looks fantastic, but I'd much rather eat good old fashioned buttercream.

He's cutting his top two teeth, so he's been a bit grumpy lately. This means that he wouldn't let anyone else hold him. He's such a mama's boy. I have to admit, though, it's kind of nice. Lily was never clingy; she's never had a problem settling in with someone other than us. And I think that's great, especially now that she's starting to be a little shy around people she's not familiar with. (Crossing our fingers that this means we can stop worrying that if a stranger offers her some candy out of his van, she won't say, "Cool!!!" and hop in.) Hopefully this means she'll avoid my extreme shyness  but not be quite so shameless as Erik. (:-P) At any rate, I kind of enjoy when Timothy snuggles in when he sees someone reaching for him. (It's nice to be wanted, after all.) But the other side of that, of course, is that it's hard to pass him on to someone else when I have other things to do. But I still enjoy it just a little because I know the day will come (sooner than I'd like, I'm sure) when he won't want to be held by mommy at all.

But I think he still had a fun time, even if he didn't want me to let him go. We got him his own little cake with traditional icing and let him go to town. It did take a finger-full of frosting from Grandma Nancy, though, to convince him it was delicious and that he really was going to enjoy being put in the booster to have his way with it.

It's been a pretty good year. Lily loves her Timothy even if he does mess with her stuff when she doesn't want him to. (Just wait, right?) It's amazing how his little personality is already coming out. Sometimes, when she tells him to leave her stuff alone, he takes a deep breath and lets her know how he feels about it. He always giggles when he sees his blanket, and then he crawls as fast as he can to get to it so he can dive head first into it. He knows when he has something he shouldn't and will hand it to us without our even asking. Usually after taking a lick first to make sure it's not something tasty. He loves feeding himself, but if I'm feeding him, he's usually placated by holding a spoon of his own, even if he's not using it for anything. We're working on moving to a sippy cup, but he's been very vocal about that change and will throw the cup to make sure we really get his point. One of his favorite pastimes is splashing in Laddie's water bowl and then turning to make sure we see him doing it. He likes to bear crawl and crawls normally as fast as he can but shows no in interest in pulling himself up to standing or walking. And that's fine by me. I remember how excited we were for Lily to start walking and then when it happened, it just doubled the chasing we had to do.

It's been a year with some adjustments, of course. I wouldn't say having two kids is harder than having one, but it definitely presents its own set of challenges. Especially on nights when Erik is working, I think Lily feels a little neglected on nights when Timothy seems to need a little more attention. I'll admit, I'm not great and giving them both the attention they need at the same time. I can multi-task lots of things, but apparently, that isn't one of them. So I have to make sure once he's in bed, Lily and I can sit just one on one and read some stories or color some pictures. Or even play her version of house, for which my attention span is extremely short. Now that Timothy is more willing to just cruise around and check things out, this is getting easier, and I hope it will keep going that direction.

Even with the adjustments, the lack of sleep, the frustrations, and all that other stuff, this has been a great year with some great memories. In just one year, I find it hard to remember what it was like before Timothy...it just feels like he's always been here somehow. And I love the addition he's been to our family.

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The mind of a baby

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Let Me Count the Ways

This morning, we have a very grumpy Lily...for reasons we're not yet sure of. And when Lily's grumpy, any little thing will set her off into a stream of tears, whining, and writhing on the floor. From that point on, EVERYTHING, any perceived slight, will start the tears again.

This morning, the catalyst was when her two shows for the morning were over and it was time to turn off the tv. The next injustice was being told no when she asked to play games on the iPod (she's not very good about stopping when we say it's time or accepting that she doesn't need to play it all day, so we've severely limited the game time). The final straw, apparently, was that Erik was sitting on the ottoman in Timothy's room while I fed him a bottle and there wasn't any room for Lily to sit.

"You're MEAN!!!" It's the new phrase du jour, and we hear it at least once a day. How? we asked. She proceeded to tick off the ways on her fingers.

"You won't let me watch a show. You won't let me play games on your phone. You won't let me sit where I want. That's FOUR MEANS!" Like mean is now a noun and you can add up the number means in a day.

Wait a minute...wasn't that only three? So she ticked them off again.

"No, it's FOUR! You won't let me watch a show. You won't let me play games on your phone. Or the iPod..."

Oh....so the phone and the iPod were two separate transgressions.

So we're slowly working through the injustices of the world and trying to teach her that, no, sometimes she doesn't get to do everything she wants. What confuses me is that we've never let her just do everything she wanted whenever she wanted it. So where did this sense of entitlement come from? Where did the impatience and not wanting to wait her turn come from? Is it just her age, or did we wreck her somehow? I guess all we can do it be consistent (that's always the key, isn't it: be consistent) and hope that she's just testing the boundaries. And that usually works. I mean, right now, she's playing just as happy as can be with non-electronic toys. Remember those??? It's just the journey of getting her calmed down enough to remember there are other things to do. Man, it's exhausting.

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Sleepover

As I write this, Erik is sleeping (well, maybe not yet...but he's trying) on Lily's floor under a tent constructed from a comforter and a sheet. It's main supports are a dresser and an easel leaning precariously against the wall. Lily has been asking for weeks to have a sleepover with one of us, but it's always on a night when we have to work the next morning, so the creaky joints and stiff back that would result weren't too appealing.  (Man we're getting old.) There was also the prospect that I'd be wiggling my way out of a tent half awake because that would be the night Timothy would decide to go back to not sleeping. (We've had a blissful sleep week as far as he's concerned, by the way. Blissful!)

But tonight was the magical night, and Erik figured that since he was already sore from crawling around on the floor at work for inventory, he might as well make a night of it and sleep on the floor, too, since he'll have the next week of vacation to recover. Way to take one for the team, I know.

So I just wanted to let the entire internet know how much I love my husband and how willing he is to indulge our daughter in something so simple but that will make her so happy and create such a great memory. And she'll remember it...you can count on that. It will be weeks, maybe even months from now, and she'll say, "Hey guys! Remember yesterday when Daddy had a sleepover with me in my room and we built a tent and used the flashlight to read Hop on Pop? Remember that? That was so fun!"

And at least I know that if she's on the floor, there's no risk of hurting herself. Unlike the other night when I peeked in to check on her before I went to bed.

Yes...she's sleeping standing up. Don't ask me how she got into this predicament or how long it would have been before we heard the thud of her falling over. The "Thanks, Daddy" when Erik lifted her a back into bed was the sweetest thing. There are days she makes me want to pull my hair out, for sure. If she's this emotional at 4, what are we in for at 13? But I definitely wouldn't trade her in for anything. I don't think. No...Yeah, I wouldn't. She one adorable little girl and I love her.

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9 months

Timothy is now 9 months old. We kind of like him, so we've decided the trial period is over and we'll keep him. Especially now that he's back to sleeping through the night...most of the time.

This whole parent thing definitely doesn't come easily to me, but I'm still trying and I hope I'm doing an ok job. All I know is that when I'm the most frustrated, that's when he seems to give me this look that melts my heart and helps me remember I'll get through it...eventually. Plus he's so darn cute. Here's a look at how he's grown:

And I think Lily likes him, too. Of course, the sharing is very one way. What's Timothy's is hers and what's hers is hers. But for the most part she's a good helper and I think there's already a pretty strong bond...which I think is fantastic.

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Wherein Timothy makes things interesting

I've heard the stories. From so many people. Some I've known and some I only know through hearsay. Mommy puts her adorable baby down for a nap. A couple hours later, that adorable baby lets Mommy know they're awake and ready to party. Mommy walks into the room to find her so-called adorable baby has removed their diaper and created a masterpiece on the wall, on the crib, on their clothes, and (gasp!) maybe even all over their face. Lily, fortunately, never did that. The worst thing I found when I went into get her after a nap was a mess of diaper liners that I had left too close to the crib.

 

I definitely counted myself lucky. (Side note...ohmigosh, doesn't she look just like Timothy in that picture?!?!?)

This morning, however, I learned I may not get off so easy with Timothy. When I was getting him ready for bed last night, I grabbed a pair of pajamas he hadn't worn in a while. Usually, he rocks comfy fleece footie jammies and I had totally planned on doing our usual, but then I saw the cute pair I bought him for Christmas. They were a little on the big side at the time and since it was a shirt and pants instead of one piece, the pants kept falling down. So he only wore them a couple times before I decided we needed to wait just a bit. Last night, I decided it was time to give them another go.

After feeding him this morning at 6:30, I laid him back down and hoped he'd be content enough to give me at least a half hour more sleep...maybe even 45 minutes. That would be divine. I crawled back into bed and was surprised to wake up 2 hours later! I haven't been able to sleep in like that for a while and it was great. Erik had set Lily up with Bambi before he left for work so she'd been completely entertained and Timothy had finally slept in like a normal person. Timothy was still sound asleep, or so I thought since no sounds were coming from his room. But it wasn't long before I heard him rustling. I finished my breakfast and checked my email before I went in to get him.

He may have been quiet, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't asleep, because there he was with no pants on. And his diaper unfastened. And you totally thought I was going to say that he'd smeared poop everywhere. Luckily he hadn't...yet. But yes, the diaper was poopy, so I'm sure that if I'd had one or two more emails, I would have had a very different morning.

There's no picture...sorry. I didn't want to risk what would happen while I went to grab the camera. But I'm pretty sure this is one kid we will need to watch like a hawk. He wants to have everything he knows we don't want him to. You can pile a million toys up in front of him, and he'll zoom in on the remote or itsy, bitsy, tiny piece of paper you never noticed. And if you take it away? What were you thinking, woman?!?!? Let me tell you how I feel about that! This could get very interesting...

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Lily turns 4!

So I'm totally late posting this...like two weeks late. But I guess it's better late than never, right?

On January 19th, Lily turned 4. I know, right? Can you believe she's 4 already? I know I can't. Since she's older and the kids who would be coming to her party are now older, too, we decided not to have the party at our house. There's really just not enough space for everyone who would be coming and the kids wouldn't really have anywhere to run around since we live in the arctic and have to stay inside. So Erik suggested we have the party at the Cache Valley Fun Park and let the kids do the soft play (a HUGE McDonald's-like playground).

Lily and all the kids had a great time, and the Fun Park provided the food and cake. Oh yeah...and the clean up. That was worth the cost right there! :) There was one minor break down for the birthday girl when she wanted the cake and not the pizza while we were eating dinner. But it didn't last long and we moved right along to cake and presents as soon as the pizza dwindled.

We may have made a bit of a mistake, though. She's already talking about wanting to have her birthday there next year. We have set the precedent, I suppose, so we'll see what happens.

So yeah...the fact that I have a 4 year old just blows my mind. I was watching her do something the other day and I realized she's not a little girl any more - and she's sure to tell you so because she's a big girl. And she really is. It always amazes me how much she develops each year. I always think that nothing will compare to the changes we saw that year and then the next year always makes me take it back. You'd think I'd learn, but apparently not because I'm going to say the same thing this year: There's no way she'll change next year as much as she did this year.

She's so articulate and methodical. Even her pediatrician commented on it at her check up. I mean, you always like to think your kid is ahead of the rest, but then don't all parents think that? It was kind of nice to receive some validation there. She's obviously very interested in reading and writing. She can write her own name by herself and can write the rest of the family's if we tell her the letters. She memorizes entire books and then reads them back to us or her babies. Word. For. Word. She sings all the time, which makes our life very much like an opera since she just sings about what we're doing at the time. Her imagination is great and so detailed. I love it!!

We still have the normal toddler mis-behaviors, of course. And honestly, they should call it the Terrible Threes because this last year was a million times worse than those so-called Terrible Twos. It seems like the breakdowns were less frequent, but their intensity was much worse. That seems to be subsiding now (thank goodness), and we almost don't dread going out in public any more. But we still have our days... I'm actually reading a book right now that would label Lily as "spirited," and in just reading the first 3 or so pages, it described Lily and our life perfectly. Apparently, there is hope that she'll end up a normal, functioning adult, so I feel better now. :) And the big thing: her spirited-ness wasn't our fault! Seeing other kids who just comply with their parents and don't go from elated to devastated 10 times a day made me wonder what we'd done wrong. But it turns out she just came that way. The trick is to learn to deal with it and help her do the same. Wish us luck!

So even though I can't believe the changes and growth we've seen this year, I do know that we'll see even more in the next year. And while I'm excited to see who she'll become, I do admit it's a little bittersweet. She'll always be my little girl, but I'm a little sad that it's going so fast.

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Is this normal?

Today I attended a tea party prepared by Miss Lily herself. Here is what we had to eat:

 I just know the lack of blue food annoyed her...

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Six months in

If you can believe it, our little guy is now 6 (6.5, really) months old. And here's what we know so far...

Stats

• Weight: 14.5 lbs
• Length: 26.25 inches

Likes

• Lillian and Laddie (We get the biggest smiles when either one comes in the room, and nursing quickly comes to an end; whatever they are doing is infinitely more interesting than eating.)
• Anything colorful
• Anything that makes noise
• Tags
• Grabbing anything within arm's reach
• Practicing yoga moves that any yogi would be totally jealous of (usually during a diaper change, making my job nearly impossible)
• Gnawing on his hands
• Gnawing on my hands
• Gnawing on anything that fits in his mouth, really

Dislikes

• Getting his face wiped off
• Sleeping
• Being alone (for even two seconds)
• Having what he's gnawing on taken away
• Sleeping (Wait; did I say that already?)
• Being put in his car seat
  

So yeah...the sleeping isn't so great. Remember a couple months ago when I bragged about his great sleeping? When we could put him down around 8, he'd wake up once to eat, and then he'd sleep until 7 or 8 the next morning? That's completely gone out the window. Oh, he still goes down around 8 without fail. If you try to keep him up (which I have in hopes that a later bed time and more exhausted baby would mean sleeping through the night), he falls asleep in your lap at 8 any way. Now we're lucky if he sleeps  3 hours for the first stretch. Then after that, I'm up probably every hour and a half...two if I'm extremely lucky and he feels like being generous. Then there's usually at least one stretch during the night, usually around 3 or 4, when he wakes up as soon as I put my head back on my own pillow and we play that game for about an hour.

Our pediatrician was really less than helpful at Timothy's six-month check-up. After hearing how we approach bed time and what we've been doing, his response was, "Sounds like you know all the guidelines. The only thing I can say is that eventually he'll sleep." I guess I wasn't really expecting any earth-shattering advice. I mean, I do quite a bit of my own research online and had read what I could find about "establishing good sleep habits." But I was still hoping he'd have some gem of a revelation I haven't heard about.

I've tried so many different tactics. Formula before bed (maybe it will take longer to digest and he'll sleep better), more blankets (maybe he's cold), fewer blankets (maybe he's hot), a constant stream of lullabies (and not crappy ones...these are lullaby renditions of Journey and Queen), a mobile, teething tablets, a stuffed animal (maybe he gets lonely), the Sleep Sheep he got for Christmas (award winning can't be wrong, right?). Nothing seems to help. Some helped for a day or two, so I'm assuming that was actually just coincidence. The real problem, however, isn't getting him to sleep in the first place. It's getting him back to sleep once he wakes up - and while these solutions seemed to help in the initial falling asleep, they suddenly become ineffective at 3 in the morning.

One good thing about his sleeping, though, is that his 45-minute cat naps seem to be stretching out a little. Some days, we even get a 2-hour nap out of him. I guess I have to look at the bright side. Plus, during the day, he's so dang cute when he's awake (he can be cute in the middle of the night, too, but it's not much appreciated). I mean, how can you stay mad at a face like this?

So we're plugging away, and I just keep hoping that tonight will be the night. It's got to happen sometime, right? Right??

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Miss Lily Tells It Like It Is

At just shy of 4 years old, Lily is pretty confident in her understanding of the world and is amazingly smart (at least I think so). As you have probably gathered, Dora is one of her favorite shows. But I'm beginning to think she might need to move on to more sophisticated programming. The other night while she watching it, this is what I heard:

Dora: We have to find the bridge. Can you help us find the bridge?

Lily: It's right there, dumbo.

Dora: Where's the bridge?

Lily: I said, it's right there, dumbo!

After I pulled myself together in the kitchen, I went in the other room and explained why we don't call people "dumbo," but I have to say I was a little proud of her for finally wondering why Dora has such a hard time finding things that are right in front of her... :-)

Then, this morning before leaving for daycare, she provided some insight into spiders:

Lily: Last time I went to Angie's, Zayners (Angie's son, Zayne, who is the same age) found a spider.

Erik: A spider? Oh no.

Lily: Yeah. And you know what spiders do? They will crawl up you and bite you and then KILL YOU. (Think Achmed, the dead terrorist when she says KILL YOU, because that's exactly what it sounded like.)

Erik: Well, spiders do bite sometimes, but they don't usually kill you.

Lily: No. It was a boy spider, and the boy spiders will kill you!!! (Who knew??!!??)

Erik: Oh, ok. You know what you should do when you see a spider? (He showed her how to squish a spider.)

Lily: I'll have to show Zayners that!!!!

It's so fun listening to her explain what's going on around her. She gets very serious and explains exactly what we should or should not be doing or how something works. It's often accompanied by a pointed finger for emphasis, making it hard to take her very seriously. How can you not laugh? But she's big enough now that if you do laugh, she is not amused. So you just have to nod in agreement and hope she doesn't notice the smirk you're trying to hold in. 

I absolutely love her to pieces.

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Peas, please

Lily was never much of a spitter when it came to eating baby food. But this kid? Let's just say the bib would have been more useful on me...

 

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Mission Complete: One Month

Where has the time gone? Timothy is officially one month old and I'm having a hard time comprehending that. I feel like we've been super busy but super lazy at the same time. How is that possible?

We haven't done anything of much excitement in the last month - I will admit that. Lily and I try to take a walk most mornings. (Timothy tags along in the stroller, and sometimes I'm game to dealing with Laddie, too.) I think it's something she's started to look forward to because as soon as we're done with breakfast, she asks if we can go on our walk. During these walks, Lily has taken on the task of single-handedly ridding the neighborhood of dandelions. Having semi-planned activity every morning has been good for me since it encourages me to get ready for the day.

And some mornings, that's harder than others since Timothy isn't much of a night sleeper. The first couple weeks weren't bad since that's about all he did around the clock. But over the last week or so, he's decided he wants to be held all the time and will wake up as soon as he's put down. I guess he takes after Lily that way. I can't remember how we dealt with it for Lily other than I think I spent a couple nights sleeping in the glider. Trying to avoid that fate this time, we're plugging away, but it makes for some groggy mornings when I've had maybe an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Erik, of course, is oblivious since he has no problem sleeping through the whole thing (even though Timothy is still sleeping has his bed in our room at the moment).

Our days are about the same, really, so I feel like I don't get much accomplished. I'm either feeding Timothy or trying to get him to sleep and/or stop fussing. And during the times he's actually asleep or sitting contentedly, I try to spend some time with Lily doing something she wants to do. I feel like I'm having to tell her "in just a minute" way more often than I'd like. I don't know if she's noticed or if she even cares, but I still feel bad. Needless to say, my day is completely full but my house is still a disaster (it's probably not as bad as I think it is, but in my sleep-deprived state, the clutter just mocks me) and before I know it, the day is over and I'm back to trying to catch a few minutes of sleep before Timothy realizes I've put him down and begins to let me know his displeasure.

Sleep issues aside, we're enjoying our new addition. Lily is a very big helper and wants to be right in the middle of all the action. She makes sure I remember to change his diaper and helps him find his pacifier when it falls out of his mouth. If she's busy with other things when that happens, she's quick to remind me I need to do it. A couple weeks ago, she asked if we could keep him, so I'm assuming that's a good sign. Much better than asking if we HAVE to keep him, right? When he starts to cry, she sings him Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, which will amazingly make him stop most of the time.

We haven't just hung out at home, though. We've gone on a couple adventures, too. We hit the Summerfest twice, once just for the food and once to check out the wares. For the Fourth, we met up with the gang and watched fireworks. Lily is almost done with her second session of swimming lessons for the summer, which she is really enjoying. Especially now that she's ok once again with putting her head under the water. And we've had some nice visits with family. We'll also be going camping in August just before I head back to work (it's coming too soon!!!). It's been so nice to have my maternity leave during the summer. Even if we aren't participating in a lot of uber-interesting activities, I feel more free to go out and about since we don't have to worry about bundling a baby up like we did with Lily.

Life has changed completely but stayed the same all at the same time. It's been an exhausting month...I won't deny it. But it's all been worth it.

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The Whole Story

Both kids are currently asleep, so I decided to use some of the welcome quiet time to provide the whole story of little Timothy's arrival and what we've been up to over the last couple days. (Although I could really use a nap, but sleep is for the weak, right?)

So...I suppose I should start at the beginning. At my regular appointment last Thursday, the doctor let us know that he didn't think I would make it to my already-scheduled induction date of June 28. Everything was already moving towards labor preparations, and I was further along than they usually see at 37 weeks. So he told us not to make any big plans, and he'd see us next week for another appointment if I made it that long.

Here I was, thinking I was so in control. My induction was scheduled. My mom had made arrangements to come stay with Lillian. I was wrapping up things at work so I didn't leave everyone with a huge jumble of half-completed projects. I had a couple weeks to do the few more things around the house that I wanted to. I was ORGANIZED, dang it. And honestly, completely scared of going into labor naturally. Yes...I know. I'd already done the whole labor and delivery thing with Lily, but since I was induced with her, I had no real idea what I should be watching for. Everything says, "You'll just know when it's time," yadda, yadda, yadda. But what if I didn't????

But apparently Timothy didn't care for my plans. Instead, I woke up Saturday morning about 2:30a to use the bathroom. I'd been back in bed for maybe 20 minutes when my water broke! At least if my original plan wasn't going to work out, I was able to substitute it with the middle-of-the-night dash to the hospital. But I'll tell you, if my water hadn't broken, I don't know that I would have known "it was time." Luckily, I had decided I better pack a bag after the doctor's appointment. (Which Erik thought was overkill. Humph...shows what he knows.)

Erik was filling in on overnights for another manager (who happened to be out for paternity leave...), so I called him and we were at the hospital by 3:30a, Lily in tow and hoping one or both of our moms made it in time to watch her during the crucial moments. On Thursday, I was at 3cm. When they checked me at the hospital, I was a 6+. An hour later, I was at a 7. With Lily, I went from a 7 to a 10 to holding a baby in just half an hour. This time was no different. No need to waste time going from a 7 to a 10 for me. Just skip those extra steps and move it right a long, thank you very much.

When we called the nurse back in right after she walked out the door, I think her exact words were, "I just checked her." After waiting for what seemed like FOREVER for the doctor to arrive so I could actually start pushing, Timothy arrived a little over 2 hours after labor started. (Completely drug-free, I might add. What's the point of doing a completely natural childbirth if you can't brag about it afterward, right?!?!?)

Since then, things have been pretty good. Lily is definitely seeing that there will be some adjustments now that baby brother has come home. But I think she's handling it well so far. She is very interested in helping (and I mean VERY INTERESTED), so we're working on helping her learn when she can help and when she needs to let Mommy or Daddy handle it. She's always very concerned if he's crying and tries her hardest to comfort him. The other night during dinner, we could hear him fussing on the baby monitor, so she ran up stairs and we heard her sing Rock-a-bye Baby to him. It was the sweetest thing I think I've ever heard. I know she's going to be a great big sister.

So far, Timothy has been a pretty good baby. We're having a few feeding issues...mostly that he doesn't want to stay awake while he does it. Our first night home was the worst since he never would eat enough to be happy and sleep, and I ended up only getting about 2 hours of sleep. But last night was loads better, and he seems to be getting better about finishing a meal before falling back asleep. And he's definitely very cute. He makes the cutest faces when he's hungry. And it's probably not very nice of me, especially as his mother, to make this comparison, but these faces remind me of the alien at the end of Men in Black:


Lily has decided we should keep him, even though she really, really wanted a sister. So I think he's here to stay. I know he's going to grow super fast, and I think I'm ready for the ride...

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Continuing the Tradition

With a mom who liked to bake, I was usually involved in the process when I was little. And being the curious little person I was, I wanted to try everything. This included butter, pickle juice, vanilla, and on and on. Apparently, vanilla elicited quite the amusing face, and I don't think I ever wanted to try it again. Butter, on the other hand, was good enough that for years after, I would sneak a finger full when I could. Disgusting, I know.

Now, years later, I love to bake myself, and for some reason, I've been doing it even more than usual with the pregnancy. With Lillian, I craved spicy foods. This time around, it seems to be sweets. I've tried to keep my sweet intake in check since those pounds won't come off by themselves once the baby's born. But rather than deprive myself completely, I've allowed myself to bake something yummy once a week. This week's concoction was Banana-Chocolate Chip bars because I had an entire bunch of bananas that was quickly turning brown and squishy and I had just made banana bread last month. (Maybe we should stop buying bananas?!?)


Lily has figured out that once the mixer comes out, I'm doing something fun, so it's not long before she's pulled a chair over to the counter to help. She likes to help pour everything in and stir when she can. Yesterday, she also helped mash the bananas, which seemed to be a lot of fun. I've been waiting for the day that she asks to try the vanilla, just so I could keep the tradition alive, but I haven't had the chance. Until yesterday. Suddenly, she was very interested in what I was actually putting in the bowl. First, she asked what the brown sugar was. When I told her, she informed me, "I don't think I like brown sugar." I asked if she wanted to try it since I was pretty sure she'd find it pretty tasty given the chance, but that was a no go. She was SURE she didn't like brown sugar. Then came the vanilla:

Lily: What's that?
Me: Vanilla.
Lily: I think I like vanilla.
Me: You do? Do you want to try it?
Lily: Yeah!

After she licked the measuring spoon, I watched her face. No real reaction, so...

Me: What do you think?
Lily: I think I like vanilla. (very hesitantly)
Me: Really?
Lily: No. I think I need a drink.

So no funny face, but I think she said it all. Definitely a great addition to the family legacy of moms allowing their daughters to get the full experience of baking.

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