The OFFICIAL announcement

Now that I think most of our family and friends have heard the news (and OH! The controversy that ensued!!! You know who you are. :-D), I will finally do an official blog post about our baby news.

So yes...I'm pregnant and due July 3, 2010. And I'm totally thrilled, but at the same time, there's this nagging trepidation. I think my biggest cause of anxiety comes from the complications we had last time. I had my first prenatal appointment just before Thanksgiving, and the first question I asked was if there was anything I could do to prevent preeclampsia this time around. And the answer was a big NO. No one knows what causes it, and there's no way to know it's coming. And the only real cure is to deliver the baby, which is what happened last time. While everything turned out OK with Lillian, I would really rather not have another baby in the NICU for a couple weeks. So for the next 7 months, I've got that looming over my head, wondering if my "healthy" pregnancy will turn out to be not quite so much.

The rest of my trepidation comes from things that, logically, I know will all work out, but they pop into my thoughts now and again. For instance, when I was pregnant with Lillian, I was anxious because I didn't know what to expect. I'd never been pregnant before, never had a baby, never been the main care giver for a small human, and on and on. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into. Now, I DO KNOW what to expect, and that's almost just as bad! :) There are some days, when Lillian is acting especially two, that I wonder what in the world we were thinking. We really want to go through this again? Of course there are also times when I realize she's growing up so fast, and I miss the times when she was small and not so independent (defiant). Then I'm optimistic again.

Not to mention that in about 7 months, Lillian's life will be changing as she knows it. As a first born, I have to trust that this won't scar her too badly. I only vaguely remember when Garrik joined the family and really, I can't remember life before him anyway. Since Lillian and Baby #2 will be about the same age difference, I assume it will eventually be the same for her. But let's forget 20+ years from now for just a minute. It's those first couple months I'm thinking about mostly. She loves babies, granted, but usually when I'm not holding them. This could be an issue...

Again, I know everything will work itself out, but I'm a worrier by nature and I'm off to a good start.

On the physical side of things, I'm doing pretty well. I've been sicker than I ever was with Lillian. Constant queasiness 24/7. (Possible sign of a boy to come???) A remedy that works one day has no effect the next, but it seems to be easing up a little and will hopefully be gone completely in the next couple weeks.

And I hate to admit it, but it seems my pants have gotten tighter a lot sooner than last time. Hopefully this isn't an indication of things to come. But I will admit: I'm kind of excited about the prospect of being able to go back to elastic-waisted pants!! :) After sorting through my maternity clothes from last time, I realized I need to go shopping. You have to find that silver lining somewhere when you're looking at the prospect of having to neglect your current wardrobe for the better part of a year, and since Lily was a winter baby, my current maternity stock pile is just plain unsuitable now. If anyone has the scoop on cute maternity clothes that won't break the bank, please share.

Of course the shopping isn't just for me in my time of fashion need. I find myself checking out what's new in the baby world. Not much has changed, I guess, since I was shopping for Lily, but it's fun all the same. It's also fun to see what new things have come out and, being an "experienced" mom, I can just roll my eyes. Last time, all the fun gadgets just sounded so helpful and convenient. Now I know that most of the time, those fun gadgets are more hassle than they're worth.

Thanks to everyone for their congratulations, and we'll keep you updated on how things are going. And I'm hoping to revive my blogging desire here soon. :)