Purses
I'm not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the line, I developed a weird thing about purses. I never carried one in high school, even once I started driving. I just kept my license in a planner, and that was either shoved in my backpack or sitting in the center console. Once I left for college, I broke down and got a small purse since I needed something other than my entire school bag to carry stuff in. That must have been the start of my condition. Now I end up buying a new purse at least every six months, sometimes more often. And my condition only worsened after I had Lillian.
Before Lillian, I was perfectly content to carry the smallest purse known to man as long as it had a shoulder strap and as long as it held my wallet and cell phone. But now I have to carry a small store around with me. Diapers, wipes, fruit snacks, fruit bars, Kleenex, Excedrin, lotion, crayons, toys, etc., etc. (Some of this stuff is also for Erik's benefit. I think men should carry purses, too.) Since the diaper bag the hospital gave us for free was absolutely hideous, I was not going to carry that around. I went to carrying a cute tote, and then a very unstructured hobo, but I couldn't keep things organized and I was always digging through them to find anything. So I found a cute diaper bag made for OCD moms like me with lots of pockets for organizing and it could double as a purse, too. It was huge compared to what I used to carry, but I was ok with it.
Once Lillian stopped requiring diaper changes a million times a day, I decided I could go back to a more sophisticated purse. I'm currently on my fourth try at finding a good option. I originally went back to one of my older purses still sitting in my closet. It worked ok, but I wanted something new. The next try was a little too small to carry all I needed it to, so I went with a larger tote. But then I was back to digging through it to find everything since it was tall and skinny and everything settled at the bottom. So I went for something in the middle: a shorter, wider bag big enough to hold it all. Everything still settles on the bottom, but it doesn't take nearly as long to dig through it. I thought I could be happy with it.
But now I find myself eying people's purses. I imagine how my stuff would fit and what a better job it would do than what I have now. I try to justify spending $230 on this one when chances are it would also fall short of expectations (even though I'm absolutely in love with it). Today, I even went so far as to try convincing myself I should order it before tomorrow so I can get 20% off. And that's a great deal, so how can I pass it up? But I chickened out since I can just see myself, six months from now, back to this same point and out $184.
I wonder if I will ever find a purse that completely and totally lives up to my high expectations and the potential it has when I see it in the store. I highly doubt it, but I'm willing to keep looking.
Purses are an interesting thing. As a little girl, I probably had several. I remember a patent leather black one and, of course, the white one for Easter. Not to be used after Labor Day. In those days, we dressed up to go to town to shop. I would take my purse, which usually only held a cute hanky, and would inevitably leave it somewhere while distracted by something else. I am sure my mother despaired. As a teen, we didn't carry back packs to school, so we had to carry a purse for our money, driver's license and other female essentials. I honestly don't remember any of my purses except a leather bag with a shoulder strap. These purses were quite popular as they were tooled like cowboy belts and then "painted" somehow. Each one was unique, but every one had one. This was after high school. I can probably count on one hand the number of bags I have had since then. I buy really nice leather bags and use one daily until it wears out. I had a nice blue one that got softer and softer until it just couldn't be used anymore. After that was a nice ivory one that I replaced when the fabric from the lining was showing through to the outside. I then had another blue one with a shoulder strap. Actually, they all had shoulder straps to start with but ended up as clutch bags because the strap would break off. The last blue one's shoulder strap broke off one side and when I couldn't fix it, I cut off the other side and carried it like a clutch. I was particulary fond of that bag because it had this great compartment for credit cards so I didn't have to carry a separate wallet. My SIL, Heather, was hating this bag because it was so worn out and whenever we went shopping together, she would make me look at the purses and I could tell her what was wrong with all the bags. I just could not find one as good as the one I had, dicey as it was. Last year (2007) for my birthday, she sent me a purse she found at TJMax. Having listened to my every complaint and wish for the perfect purse, she actually found it. I carry it daily and will until it wears out. It's black with two outer pockets; perfect for the cell phone I didn't have until a month ago. It has the slots for cards and a separate slot for my license, two zippered compartments for items one does not want falling out and a roomy main compartment. I can honestly say I am a one purse woman and am never tempted by their siren song.